Break-up’s- Goodbye Always Means Hello

Break-up’s suuuuuuuck! Crying, ripping pictures, playing slow songs that make your heart ache, wearing his T-shirt around the house as you plead with your girlfriends to explain why this relationship didn’t work, or you can do what Oprah Winfrey did and flush your ex-boyfriends keys down the toilet so he cannot leave… I’ll admit that’s going too far (but I do giggle a little).

Break-ups are so painful because you invested a lot of your time. It’s OK- be angry, sad, dramatic, and distant. We never start relationships assuming it’s going to end one day.  Allow yourself to mourn the loss-it doesn’t matter how bad the guy was, you’ll still feel some sense of loss.

Accept the only way the pain goes away is by allowing time to pass. You cannot take a pill to ease the pain, you cannot shake it off like a stubbed toe, and no matter what my old professor says, being under someone does not get you over someone else.

The one positive thing about a break-up is we will eventually get over it, if we allow ourselves to move on. One day we wake up and we don’t think about him anymore. The sound of his voice isn’t missed, his shirt has become your cleaning rag, and most of all our heart will not hurt anymore.

That excited feeling of endless possibilities is the feeling of saying, “Hello.” You take off the sweats and put on a sexy summer dress. You try new things just to try it. You smile more and say, “yes” to the new guy, the job, the new town, or the love of your life. You say “Hello” to limitless living. That feels good.

Look at Jennifer Aniston. Her movie career blossomed after her divorce from Brad Pitt. We all know Oprah is a success. Where do you think she would be if that guy fished his keys out of the toilet and stayed with her? You can even think of the come up Elisabetta Canalis (George Clooney‘s most recent ex) is experiencing now on Dancing With The Stars.

When you allow the end to take place you will get to a moment in your life that you thank your lucky stars he is gone.  Remember the good times and take away the lesson of the relationship. Do not beg, plead, or convince him to stay with you. Though you deserve an explanation, you owe it to yourself to walk away like a lady. No regrets from beginning to end. The longer you linger in your pain the longer it will take for you say, “Hello” to the new and better you.

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